(:

Love?

Love:

• a strong positive emotion of regard and affection
  
• any object of warm affection or devotion
  
• have a great affection or liking for
• a deep feeling of sexual desire and attraction
• sleep together: have sexual intercourse with
• Love is chemical imbalances within the brain
• Love is confinement, commitment and a loss of freedom

Subjective:

1. Subjectivity refers to a person's perspective or opinion, particular feelings, beliefs, and desires. It is often used casually to refer to unsubstantiated personal opinions, in contrast to knowledge and fact-based beliefs. In philosophy, the term is often contrasted with objectivity.
2. Subjectivity - judgment based on individual personal impressions and feelings and opinions rather than external facts
3. influenced by personal opinion.


Today, I've realised EVERYTHING is subjective.

The worst feelings in life.

The Worst Feelings in Life:
-Being told that someone is better than you
-Knowing that you're being lied to
-Letting yourself be beat down
-Crying hard.
-Loosing someone close.
-Watching yourself fade away.
-Falling apart because you're alone
-Being alone because you're falling apart.
-Hating yourself
-Not being good enough.
-Being told she's prettier
-Being mad at someone because you're mad at yourself
-Best friends falling apart
-Being told that you are fat.
-Breaking up
-Falling out of love
-Being used.
-Being made fun of
-Changing for someone else
-Realising that they don't love you.
-Falling asleep alone when he should be next to you.

Destroy.

Tyler Durden: Where'd you go, psycho boy?
Narrator: I felt like destroying something beautiful

Wants.

I want a pair of these. My goodness.

Freedom.

"We share conversations on how we're all just floating, through space and nothing matters, I'm looking for a pattern.
Can't we just disappear and take our chances?"

They're lost.

Sometimes other people's words sum everything up nicely.

My life line is broken.

"I went to a party once, and there was a palm reader there and when she looked at my hand, she just froze. And I said to her "I know....I know." My lifeline is broken." - Edie Sedgwick

The General Rules of Summer.

As summer has been and gone for this year, I thought I should make some rules to remember for next time.
Just so I can improve at life as my summers pass each year :)

Rules:

1. No matter where you are going, no matter who you are seeing, or how long you plan to be away for, BRING TOGS (/swimmers/whatever you choose to call them) because YOU WILL NEED THEM.
Okay so you think that's so easy and you've got that down but repeat after me, TAKE YOUR TOGS. Wearing boys underpants and your own bra, does not constitute as appropriate swimwear, unless you're on top of a mountain, swimming in rapids with only 15 or so other male members the morning after a mate's eighteenth - actually no scrap that. ( Especially when people start joking that you've made it into the pants of the person whom you'd borrowed them off.)

2. The second general rule of summer, and probably the one that will apply to the most amount of people goes like so: you think you will be away for about an hour, you will come back after about 3. You think you're only going out for a night, it's almost guaranteed you'll be gone for two, so plan you need to plan for this accordingly.

3. Because of rule two, while your so obediently packing your togs, you will need a toothbrush as well. DO NOT FORGET THIS. No one likes someone with furry teeth and bad breath :]

4. Sunburn looks lame on even the best of people. I know sun cream is greasy and disgusting and you 'wanna hav a fully sick tan 4 summa brahh' but honestly, you look like a lobster and people who look like lobsters are not very attractive.
So I've devised a simple formula for you to remember:
YOU + FUN TIMES IN THE SUN - UNATTRACTIVE SUNBURN = SUN CREAM.
Easy, yes?

5. To all the lovely princess's I have as friends, this is for you. (Actually, it's really for me more than anything ;) ) Straightened hair, perfect foundation, smoky eyes and really expensive mascara looks good during any other time of the year but LOOKS SO STUPID IN SUMMER. The humidity will melt your perfectly constructed face downwards like the ski fields in spring and cause your hair to spring up in crazy half straightened half dead ratty ringlets..
If you MUST wear something to keep you from feeling naked and exposed, waterproof mascara and concealer will do just fine. Apply sparingly :)

6. Sleeping on trampolines seems like a really sweet and lovely idea, especially when you're with someone that you quite like but really, don't bother. You'll awake shivering and freezing, and the dew will attack you with it's moist terror in the early hours of the morning. Tents work fine :)

7. A night of sobriety, watching Sydney's fireworks on TV, and playing Mario Cart on Nintendo Wii, just doesn't quite cut it for New Years celebrations. On any other evening it would be cool but it just doesn't quite get high enough on the awesome scale for the supposed biggest night out of the year.

8. Sleep is for the weak. Unless it's from about 4 in the morning onwards, or unless you have a good reason for having to awake the next morning. Otherwise, cherish the fact you don't have to attend school/work/other season's commitments in a few days time, and have fun during your night times. They are fun when you make them be :)

9. No one keeps resolutions. Especially at New Years. This is a lame tradition that from now should be conveniently ignored. Why waste the 5 seconds it took for you to think of things you've known the whole previous year, but chose to ignore at the time?

10. While summer is a perfect time for meeting people and making friends that ''make you feel alive ect. ect., summer is also meant for your already made and perfected relationships that you share with your best friends. Keep them in your plans or you'll end up never seeing them and then miss them all summer long.

11. Summer music festivals are awesome - if you actually attended. So when you come home from one, you may have one whole conversation about who you saw, how they played and if you liked the event, or even post one Facebook status update, so like-minded festival goers can comment with smiley faces and 'OOH yeah that was awesome' BUT other than this, shhhhhhh, no body really cares that much.
(this also counts for the countdown before the event)

So that's me done, I think I've covered everything I promised I'd remember for next year :)
Bring on winter with it's cold weather, warm doonas and soft socks!

I am looking for my soulmate.

I wish we were all born with labels telling us just who we were made for. "Hi there, my name is ________. I am looking for ________. They're my soulmate."

Connections.

Why do I always find the need to cut off people that get to close to me?
No matter how many people think of themselves as close friends, I always feel cut off from everyone.
I know it's a survival method I've been taught by life, but I just hate it.
I want to feel close to someone. I want to feel connection, you know?
I'm sick of finding myself pushing everyone away.

Dear sleep,

Dear sleep. I feel it's time we had a talk. Our relationship isn't as it was. I miss the good old days when we'd stay together all night and you wouldn't leave until late the following morning. Now it seems like you just come and go as you please, coming to my bed late at night and leaving a few hours later. My precious sleep, we need to find a way to fix this. x