Lust and found.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

I'm always wishing, I'm always wishing too late. For things to go my way. It always ends up the same.

10 things you wish to say to 10 different people, no names:

1. I hate being the one who has to continue the conversation, ALL OF THE TIME. I find you intriguing in the best possible way, but I'm no where near committed in any form of feelings to have to force you to open up. I'm sorry, you're lovely, but you're WAY too hard to get to know. I give up.

2. I wish I had the courage to discover the thing between us.

3. I miss you, and I know we're falling apart. We're not best friends any more. You need to put the same effort that I'm putting in. I hate that I'm loosing you.

4. You're quite the amazing, I like that I met you.

5. I find you fake, and I don't like it.

6. Stop being such a push over. Your cool. Stand up for yourself :)

7. I hate how you make me feel lonely.

8. I wish I owned your wardrobe :)

9. I don’t feel like you care anymore, and that hurts me.

10. I liked that we kissed. But hate that it's going to make us awkward. Friends?

9 things about myself:
1. I am very indecisive, and act in the moment, and this gets me in a heap of trouble.
2. I hate trouble and messy situations. I can't cope.
3. All the time (sometimes without even realising) I can be a cunt.
4. I think I'm too influenced by other people. I'd like to find myself, and be influenced by her instead.
5. I lie sometimes, for no real reason and have no real motive to. It's a weird urge I feel sometimes.
6. I constantly become involved in relationships that are anything but. Like I mean limbo situations, that eventuate to nothing. I don't like this.
7. I'm too polite sometimes to say what I really think, or act the way I'd like to act.
8. I feel like there is two of me, living within the one body. A weird yin and yang soul.
9. I hate feeling angry, confused and hurt yet it seems to be my perpetual default stage. Especially when I'm at home. Which I why I like living away in the nothing.

8 ways to win my heart:
1. Raw, and honest.
2. Easy to get to know.
3. Funny.
4. Fun.
5. Spontaneous adventures.
6. Being able to converse with me for hours on end, easily.
7. Something cute about your physical.
8. Talented at something I enjoy or respect.

7 things that cross my mind a lot:
1. "What if.."
2. What people think of me, how they see me.
3. The past.
4. Am I okay?
5. What's going to happen in the future.
6. "I need to find more music"
7. "Uuuuugh fuck, I have nothing to wear."

6 things I do before I fall asleep (in no order):
1. Take a shower
2. Think
3. Cuddle something
4. Get under a blanket of some form, I have to sleep with a blanket :)
5. Turn off the light
6. Put moisturiser on my face/legs.

5 people who mean a lot:
1. Jasper.
2.Maggie.
3. Reuben.
4. Murtie.
5. Nicky.

4 things you can’t live without
1. Water.
2. Inspiration.
3. Hope.
4. Friends!

3 bands/artists you listen to most often: (AT THE MOMENT)
1. Bright Eyes.
2. Arctic Monkeys.
3. Angus & Julia Stone.

2 things you want to do before you die:
1. Grow old with someone I love dearly.
2. Find contentedness.

1 confession:
1. I developed deep strong feelings for another boy while being in a fairly serious relationship. I didn't act on them, even though they were returned, but I kinda feel like that because I wanted something to happen it's as good as cheating and all this time later I still feel guilty.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Cassie (L)

In an effort to get my friend, Maggie, into Skins, I downloaded all of Season 1 and 2. Unable to resist I just watched the whole two seasons within the week :)
Oh how I forgot how much love I had for Cassie.
She is so Lovely :)

Bit late Coming.

This is a little late, but I thought I'd post the photos any ways.
I apologise for the length of my skirt in the first one, it had just ridden up a bit :S.

A few weeks ago, 27ish of February, I escaped my lazy town to skip down to Mardi Gras with a few lovely friends :)
Achieved: 20 hours of travelling down in two days, hundreds of thousands of people at the parade, tens of kilometres walked and possibly the sight of one too many naked people :)

The bus to Newcastle took about 5 hours I swear. By the time we'd gotten to Newcastle I was sooo sick of traveling haha.
The parade is fun :)
Hopefully next year I can get a masquerade mask to wear so I don't make it on tv and get onto a float ;)

Would have been nice to be 18.
Friend with contacts had free passes to get into the after party. Felt so stupid and lame that I was the reason they all couldn't get in, as I'm not 18 and legal yet. Gahhh :'(

Catching up with Harley was loveeeeeeely as was his view :).

About 2 hours of sleep later, we had to travel the whole way back home via train. And of all silly things to happen there was a bomb scare, someone had written under a curtain on our carriage, 'there is a bomb on this train, Run for your lives.' Of course they took it very seriously and stopped the train at the next station at Stratfield.

So they evacuated us all out of the carriage, and placed us onto the platform. Then they made us move to the other side of the platform so we were hidden behind the offices. After a tiny bit they moved us to the next platform and then down a level and then they completely evacuated the whole place.
They brought in two different bomb squads,and sniffer dogs, and wouldn't let us back onto the train without two special event cops questioning about what we'd seen that day.
Biggest waste of time.
All we wanted to do was sleep, and didn't really care all too much if we got blown up in the process..